Be Outgoing

Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to be confident in order to be outgoing. Think about it. You've probably known people who were insecure and outgoing at the same time. That's because being outgoing has nothing to do with believing in yourself; it has everything to do with practice. Now, if you want to be charming, then you'll need to build self-confidence, but becoming more outgoing is actually pretty easy. To get to a point at which you feel comfortable talking to complete strangers, follow these steps.

Steps

 * 1) Foster your curiosity about people. Wherever you go, try to observe people, and ask questions about them. I wonder what his parents look like? I wonder what her favorite color is? Is he from around here? Is she the girl I saw at the movie theater last week? It will take some conscious effort, but you can't be outgoing if you don't give a hoot about people.
 * 2) Smile at people. Make it a goal to smile at one person a day. It can be anybody, and it can be the most subtle smile. A quick glance paired with a smirk, then run away if you want. The more you do it, though, the less scary it will be. It's easiest to smile at someone when they walk into a room, or when you walk into a room, because it's a simple friendly greeting, and it doesn't seem as random. Eventually, you'll want to get to a point where you smile instinctively whenever you make first eye contact with someone.
 * 3)  Make sure to improve friendships with people you meet, it will put you inside the loop and instead of just hanging out with people you will be improving your relationships with others.
 * 4)  Be funny! Try making jokes about things that you have in common with other people. Like if you have in inside joke with someone your hanging out with then try and make a joke about it. Being funny with also lighten up the mood, and make people want to be around you.
 * 5) Ask people questions. Again, give yourself the goal of doing this once a day. The standard "how are you" doesn't really count, because people use it as a greeting rather than a real question. If you've already exchanged eye contact and smiles with someone, and you're close by, start off by saying "Excuse me, but I was wondering..." or "Hey, can I ask you something?" and pose a question. This is where the curiosity comes into play. Here are some ideas:
 * 6) *How do you like that book/magazine?
 * 7) *You look familiar. Do you work at the movie theater?
 * 8) *Is that an Egyptian baby harness?
 * 9) *What do you think of this as a gift for a mom?
 * 10) Give a compliment. If you're interested in people, you're bound to notice little things that you like or appreciate, like:
 * 11) *I've read that book. Great choice!
 * 12) *I love those shoes. They go great with that skirt.
 * 13) *That's an awesome haircut.
 * 14) Talk to a few strangers a day. Using the previous steps, you'll be reaching out to people, and practice makes perfect. Put yourself in environments where there are lots of people you don't know, and plenty to talk about, like a book or music store. There will be times when some people are cold and unresponsive and that's normal! Don't take it personally. And there are times when you'll mess up and feel like a fool - and that's normal too! Just laugh it off and move on. You don't have to be totally confident in order to be outgoing; and whenever you do feel self-doubt holding you back, think of people you know who have their insecurities but are still friendly to strangers anyway. If they can do it, so can you, right?

Tips

 * Once you feel comfortable reaching out to people, take the next step. Learn how to have a good conversation and how to be charming.
 * Never look sad when with a group of people you don't really like or not really friends with. Start a conversation and keep cool. But if they are mean, and start being mean to you, ignore them and start conversations with someone else.

Related Tips and Steps

 * How to Make Friends
 * How to Be Outgoing Outside of School
 * How to Be Outgoing in College
 * How to Be Confident and Outgoing in a Job Interview When You Are Blind or Visually Impaired