Keep Your Stomach Quiet in Public

You probably are here because you are in a quiet place for the majority of your day and your belly will unexpectedly lurch around and start making really loud and embarrassing noises. Well, fear not, because those days are over my friends.

Steps

 * 1) Eat slowly. The stomach can't easily digest the food that is eaten so fast; if the stomach feels overwhelmed, it will let its owner know.
 * 2) Chew food. Taking small bites make digestion a lot easier on the stomach.
 * 3) Drink some sort of liquid with meals; preferably water or soda. Soda works best because it sends the gas present in the stomach after a meal, up, in the form of a burp, rather than down, in the form of well...a fart.
 * 4) Try to fit a healthy amount of fiber into the diet. Not too much but not too little either. This is key because too much fiber can constipate, but a deficient amount just won't satisfy the stomach. Fiber is found in things like fruits and vegetables; "the healthy stuff," unfortunately. So how much fiber should be consumed a day? No matter how small, tall, old, or young, 20 to 30 grams of fiber per day, will satisfy the stomach. More fiber will more than likely do the trick for the majority of the people who are reading this.
 * 5) Don't starve for a long period of time and then resort to binge eating. Simple; eat when hunger is felt, no matter what the circumstances. Starving will only make the stomach hungrier. More problems are being created; none are being solved.
 * 6) Try to fit some sort of exercise into the daily routine. Just try to keep in mind that all humans have stomachs that undergo the process of digestion after eating a meal, and that there isn't a single one on the face of this earth, whose stomach hasn't made a noise in a quiet room before. Unless, of course, that person doesn't have a stomach, in which case, that person can probably fit through a paper shredder. I hope that my mistakes can be learned from.

Tips

 * Chill out about it. This is one of the many things that I didn't do, that bothered me the most.
 * If you've tried all of these steps and nothing has changed, then I suggest seeking medical help and if you still don't feel that it's that extreme, then live with it. It's really not as bad as you may think it is; the next time your stomach makes a noise, say something like, "Christ, I'm hungry," or even, "I'm freaking starving." People also often think it's very funny when you talk to your belly like it's a baby. Trust me with this one; people will laugh hysterically. "Oh no, don't cry belly; Daddy will get you some food real soon, OK?" And if you're in the middle of a test and you are questioned for talking, say that you merely had to tame the tiger that is living in your tummy. You may have read that playing it off like it never happened is the best way to go, but why not muffle the sound of your stomach with some comic relief?
 * If you are intolerant to any foods, you should probably avoid them.

Related Tips and Steps

 * How to Stop Your Stomach from Growling Loudly in Class
 * How to Keep Your Stomach from Growling in Front of Your Crush
 * How to Cure Stomach Cramps
 * How to Relax Your Stomach

Tips

 * Chill out about it.
 * If all of these steps have been followed and nothing has changed, then seek medical help or live with it. It's really not as bad as it is though of as; people often think it's very funny when a person treats the belly like a baby. People will laugh hysterically. "Oh no, don't cry belly; some food will be supplied to you shortly, OK?" And if in the middle of a test in which talking is not permitted, say that the tiger in your tummy merely needed to be tamed. Why not muffle the sound of the stomach with some comic relief?
 * Hope this helped. Have some fun with the stomach rumbles. ;) "Shush belly, shush!"

Warnings

 * Talking to the stomach may cause an uncontrollable wave of laughter to take one and all others over.

Things You'll Need

 * A noisy belly and a sense of humor.

Related Tips and Steps

 * How to Stop Your Stomach from Growling Loudly in Class
 * How to Keep Your Stomach from Growling in Front of Your Crush
 * How to Cure Stomach Cramps
 * How to Relax Your Stomach

Sources and Citations

 * Common knowledge obtained from various websites regarding this matter.