Cope with Divorce as a Child

Divorces are a difficult time shared not only with the mother and father, but also the children. Everyone goes through a wide range of emotions during this time, and it's important to know how to make the best of things. Here's how to help cope with the situation.

Steps

 * 1)  Don't blame yourself for the divorce.  It is not your fault!  It was an issue between your parents that caused the divorce, not you.
 * 2)  Understand that crying is not going to change anything.  There's nothing wrong with crying to let out your emotions or frustrations, but don't cry in an effort to change your parents' minds.  It's not going to change the circumstances of the situation.
 * 3)  Don't take out your emotions on your parents.  Understand that this is a difficult time for them, too. The pain is probably ten times worse for them. Try to be understanding.
 * 4)  Try to express your feelings in another manner.  You might write poetry, songs, stories, or entries in your diary expressing your feelings towards the divorce. Or talk to a close friend you can trust and tell them all of your feelings.
 * 5)  Understand that your parents may meet new people.  Talk to your parents about how you feel about it.  If it has a bad impact, then say so. If you don't say anything, it will eventually become very bothersome for you.
 * 6)  Invest in some hobbies, or take up a new one. Coloring, running, hanging out with friends, etc.  It will help you keep your mind occupied, and you will also be enjoying yourself at the same time.
 * 7)  Look at yourself in the mirror and say "Everything is going to be alright." Tell yourself that you are attractive and smart in front of the mirror. This will aid in your self-esteem greatly.

Tips

 * You need at least one very close friend with whom you can talk to about everything. After about a year more or less has passed since the divorce became finalized, you need someone with whom you can talk to that you are comfortable around. Don't go looking for this person, they will find you.
 * If you have a friend whose parents have also been through a divorce, then talk to him/her. It's easy to talk to somebody about something in which the both of you can relate to.
 * Create a mood board in your room. Just grab some paper and pens and colour the paper in as how you are feeling. Like blue for sad.
 * Let your parents or someone in your family such as an aunt, uncle, or even a cousin know how you are feeling. They will become concerned of your happiness later.
 * Your parents will understand that this is a tough time for you, and will always be willing to listen. So don't hesitate to talk about it, act immediately while you are thinking about it.
 * Lots of children go through a parental divorce and it is better than you think it is. All that is going to happen is someone will move out and you will spend a few days a week at each place. It isn't that bad, if they go out for a meal so that they can talk things over don't worry because they won't start shouting in a public place.

Warnings

 * If you are living with one parent or rarely see your other don't take sides (obviously depending on the reasons of divorce) or be used as a bargaining device between them.
 * Don't bottle up your emotions. It's not a healthy activity, and can lead to emotional outbursts—usually at inopportune times.  Don't be afraid to express your feelings. Sometimes going to your room and just crying for a while can help a lot. Just find a place to chill by yourself until you can pull yourself back together.
 * It may seems fun being in the middle saying "Daddy got me a PlayStation he obvious loves me more" and "Mummy got me some new trainers she loves me more" as to get money out of them however this will not make you happy as will separate your parents further.

Related Tips and Steps

 * How to Deal With Your Parents' Divorce
 * How to Talk to Your Parents
 * How to Deal With Divorced Parents
 * How to Deal With Step Parents and Step Siblings
 * How to Deal With Your Parents Fighting
 * How to Deal With Your Divorced Parents Fighting

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