Stop Ruminating (mentally Going over and over Bad Events)

You have a great day out with your friends. After coming home, you go to bed. For five minutes you think about what a fabulous day you had - and then you drift off to sleep. Next, you have the worst day of your life. Something really horrible happened to you, something which has upset you to an extent that you can't let it rest. You come home and try to sleep, but you can't. Everytime you close your eyes, you think about it...happening all over again...

Sound familiar? It is unfortunate, but it isn't so unusual for a bad event to be stuck firmly within your mind. Aside from that great day out, that happy party, is the dark and painfully intense, strong memory of that horrible time...that bad event...whatever it may be. Going over and over a traumatic occurrence can intefere with your daily life, create new fears and isolate you from what used to be...yourself. It can cause anxiety, panic attacks and a lot of other medical issues. If you find yourself regularly running over something which you'd honestly rather not, then this is the article for you.

Steps

 * 1) Accept this happened. It is no longer something you could have avoided, should have prevented, might have been able to get out of...it's done, it's in the past and it is now something that will be a memory of your past. Accepting this is the first step to stopping the problem. Constantly thinking I should've done this... or, If only... is NOT going to solve or reduce the issue in any way whatsoever.
 * 2) Focus on how the terrible events in your life have actually made you a stronger person. For instance, if you were abused as a child, think of how secure your children will be because you know the type of person to look out for. Realise that you can learn from an experience, even if it was horrible.
 * 3) Acknowledge, and even forgive, the person who did the bad things to you (you don't have to actually talk to the person to do this). Realize that your life is so much better than the life of someone who must do bad things to others. Of course, you may not be ready to forgive - perhaps not now, perhaps not ever. If so, then simply acknowledge that this person obviously has an issue, and accept what they did to you.

Tips

 * Start keeping a journal. Each day, write one bad thing that happened to you, then on the same page, write how it has helped you. You will soon see that you are much stronger and more courageous than you ever thought possible.

Warnings

 * Don't let the bad decisions of others ruin your life.
 * If your thoughts start to intrude on your normal daily activities and/or stop you from sleeping at night, consult your doctor.

Related Tips and Steps

 * How to Choose a Therapist
 * How to Get Shocking Pics out of Your Mind
 * How to Help an Acquaintance Cope with Suicidal Ideations
 * How to Deal With Guilt