Live After the Death of a Spouse

Coming home to an empty house is not easy. There is no one to greet you, and the chair opposite yours at the dinner table is empty. The house seems to echo from the silence and you shed a tear as you remember that you are now alone. So many years together, so many memories you two created together are all you have left. Losing a loved one changes your entire life, especially when the loved one was also your best friend. You feel completely lost and totally uncomfortable making even minor decisions. The bed feels big and you hug the pillows for comfort. But something inside you tells you that you can survive!

Steps

 * 1) Know that it will take time before you can begin to feel normal again, but that time will come.
 * 2) Do not pay attention to those who try to tell you that you are not grieving properly. Grief is as individual as you are, as your partner was, and as your relationship was. Specifically you will likely deal with some who think you are healing 'too fast' and those who think you have become 'stuck in your grief.' If you have concerns in those areas, talk to a grief counselor. He or she is far better prepared to help you navigate your new life than someone who has never dealt with the death of their significant other.
 * 3) Realize that you have choices. There is a time when you need to cry and there will come a time when you are ready to have a new life. When the tears come less often then you know it is time for your new life to begin.
 * 4) Store all your memories in a safe place in your heart and continue life's journey alone. Understand that your life as you knew it will never be the same, but this does not mean it will not perhaps be better. Maybe you will begin a new career or move to a new location and, if it is what you want, you might one day love again. It is still possible to find another.
 * 5) Do not worry that you will forget your spouse. You will not since in time the pain of the loss will lessen. Continue living your life with the realization of knowing that your spouse would have wanted you to be happy and productive, with or without them.
 * 6) [[Image:Ballon_ride.jpg|250px|right]]Ask yourself what it was that you have always wanted to do but something you never had time to do because of family obligations. Now is the time to do it'! Be anything you want to be. Become an artist, a pilot, or a scuba diver. Take a ride in a hot air balloon. Most of all, strive to be happy and fulfilled. Your dreams can become a reality and help fill the void in your life. You will meet new people and realize that life can be satisfying and exciting even if you are alone.
 * 7) Be patient because this change may not come quickly or easily. But once you allow yourself to be happy, you will find that you are.
 * 8) [[Image:Dog_and_cat.jpg|250px|right]]Adopt a pet. If you don't have the energy to give a great amount of attention to a pet, consider a cat. They make great companions. They are clean and do not have to be walked. They give you love and affection. They give you someone to care for and care about.  They will greet you when you come home, and lie on your lap while you watch TV. If you are not a cat person  get a dog, or whatever pet makes you happier.  Understand that the pet will not replace your love, nor is it meant to, but animals can make you smile, listen to you when you feel like talking and fill a lonely day.
 * 9) Volunteer your time to a cause or something that you feel strongly about. Think positively and leave all of your negative thoughts behind.
 * 10) [[Image:Read_book_952.jpg|250px|right]]Understand that if none of the above fits your needs, or if you are incapacitated to some degree, there is no reason why you cannot join the library and read. Most libraries have library buses that bring books to your neighborhood. Or you can rent a DVD, or watch movies on the TV. Write letters, or become a phone companion, a group that is backed by the Police Community Service. They make daily calls to shut-ins, to make sure that they are safe. Talk to them to keep them company and they will be keeping you company as well.
 * 11) Know the Truth about life. Try to understand the eternal truth of life "Every thing keeps on Changing every moment". Try to get yourself convinced how death is beneficial to the departed soul. Know that the soul never dies; Only body dies. Body is like a vehicle or cloths for the spirit. Thus when the body, by any reason doesn't remain suitable; the spirit is blessed with a new body, a new vehicle or a new dress.

Tips

 * Consider seeing a grief counselor or therapist.
 * This is a new chapter in your life. You did not ask for it, you did not expect it, but you have it nevertheless. Make the best of being alone. Be happy within yourself.
 * Gain your own strength from within, and eventually you will be able to enjoy and build your life again.
 * Try to be positive. You have a right and need to realize that life isn't always fair, but you can be thankful for what you have.

Warnings

 * Suicide is NOT the way out. If you are thinking of suicide, call 911, call a hotline, or get yourself to a therapist ASAP.
 * If you are thinking of suicide, there are better alternatives. Talk about the pain you are experiencing now that makes you believe suicide is your only way to relieve your pain. Be willing to talk about the problem for a few minutes.

Related Tips and Steps
vivir después de la muerte del cónyuge
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 * How to Help a Child Handle Father's Day After a Father's Death
 * How to Recreate Your Life
 * How to Make a Memorial Book
 * How to Be Thankful
 * How to Start Over Again
 * How to Communicate With Your Cat
 * How to Prepare for the Death of a Loved One
 * How to Remain Young Despite Becoming a Senior
 * How to Grow Old Without Feeling Old